I have literally been back and forth with my hair for years and years. I recently decided I’m going to do me every way that I know how; so I wear my natural hair, weaves, wigs, and things in between. I most often get compliments on my natural hair and the streak of color in the front that was a mistake! So I thought I would come on here and share with you all.
I have done the big chop twice since 2012 and each time I literally cut it off, felt liberated for a moment, wore it for 3 weeks and put wigs and weave on for 2 years….it was a hot mess, until I realized…I CAN DO WHAT I WANT. I was having the hardest time trying to be in a “certain community.” I wasn’t sure if I wanted to identify as a “natural,” “versatile,” or a “Weave and wig wearer.” But then it hit me, I can be all of them! There is something called intersectionality in which it is where all of our identities meet… yes, I am natural, but sometimes my hair is straight, sometimes I wear weave and wigs, and sometimes I pile it with so much gel and edge control its in a ponytail…but it does not make me less Black. Yep, I said it, there it is, I thought I was battling with my hair identity, when reality was my ethnic and physical identity was the struggle I was having. I asked myself these questions every time I did my hair, “Will my fellow sistas see me as less Black for wearing weave or my straight hair? Will White folks see me as ugly?” (some of them probably do either way), but I had questions and insecurities that stemmed far beyond just the way my hair looked, but my expression of these insecurities was through what I thought I knew best, MY HAIR.
Lately, I have begun to love my mane, I am not always pleased with my curls, but they are mine and no one can take that away from me, I have curls because I am Black and being Black is lovely! I am able to also wear weave and beautiful wigs to sometimes protect my curls and be versatile and that is ok! I am in a place where I am very comfortable with the many variations of my hair and I love that every time I step out the house, I can be different than the day before. I have begun to wear my natural hair more now that it is longer, but I have also begun to love the idea that natural hair is more than a trend now, it is a reality and something that has brought much of the Black community together (there is still a divide in some aspects, but I won’t go there). I love the fact that I can be in a natural group, but also be in a protective styling group. I have freedom and I have peace not only with my hair, but with my identity overall and it has been a long time coming!